Vignettes of Love: January
Small moments, big impact
I met a new friend last night. She had been praying for me even though we’d never met. As we talked she said something like, “I really believe it’s in the small moments that God is doing some big work.” May these vignettes1 of love give you a glimpse of how God is rendering my heart toward active love in the small moments of my life and encourage you to reflect on your own small moments found in the everyday ordinary life you live.
44
Yesterday, 44 became my age. I forced two tired children out of bed and into classrooms because- well- January mornings. My monthly extended solitude and silence found their way onto this calendar date. I prayerfully rode wobbly metal chairs to the top of snowy peaks and inhaled God’s majesty as I zigged and zagged back down. Gratitude permeated the mountainside. Seven runs later, silence on the car ride later, and a Jimmy John’s #5 on the table later, I found myself in the push-pull of pre-algebra. We survived. Then began the chauffeuring, the cheering at 7th-grade basketball games, the slicing of cheese and apples for friends hanging out while waiting for the next game, the braiding of hair for a new sport and a first practice, and finally eating my left-over dinner in the car so I could enjoy these moments with my kids. Robyn helped me pick out a cake. We sat at the table, my girls and my Sam. They sang the song I love, “our, dear Adi, may you have a long good life.” I read the cards, replied to the messages, listened to my parents singing, and looked at this Instagram reel that Sam had sent me. We laughed, tears rolling down cheeks, and then tucked the house into bed. 44: I’m here for it.
Here, Hear!
One morning, hundreds of minutes before the birds began to sing, I sat across from her and felt a nudge: here, hear. Here - be present. Be with. Here for it. Be in this moment with her. Hear - open your ears and your heart. Notice what she is saying. How she is saying it. Let her voice sound without interruption. Let her words be released and simply be with her as she offers you the intimacy of her thoughts. And so I sat with her. I gave her my all as I sipped sweetened coffee and she ate buttered toast. I held her words in the early morning. And then I drove her to practice. I returned home in the cold darkness. I sat in my blue chair. Here I am. I hear you. And the moment broke open. God’s love for me, and God’s delight in me is all about being here and hearing what I have to say. My heartaches, my angers, my annoyances and my joys and hopes too. God is here for it. God is here for me. God hears me. God delights in hearing my voice. And some truth revealed itself to my soul: this love that shows up at the sacred kitchen table is the same love that holds me in the quiet of my morning and is the same love that shines warmth into a dark January morning. These words become mine for 2025: here, hear!2
Doing the Little Things Right
“I want you to know, we are a safe family. We don’t agree with the policies being pushed out. We care about you and we care about the people you know who might be affected by these executive orders and the messages expressed within them.” I spoke these words to my friends whose families immigrated to this land more recently than my ancestors immigrated to this land. My friends, whose brown skin and Spanish accents make them an easy target for YOU do not belong here thinking, heard my words and responded.
One friend opened her phone and with it her worries. She showed me a video sent to her that morning - “...a 25-year-old, ripped from his home.”... “He has children.”... “Did you know they can go into schools? My cousins don’t want to send their children to school.” …” The ICE van was at the trailer park by the river. They were looking for somebody.”
The other friend said, “Thank you. It means a lot to know that there are people who are on our side. People who think, we're not all bad.” Both of these friends are here legally and both of these friends feel the hatred pouring forth from promises of deportation and removing safety nets from schools, churches, and hospitals. They have friends and family members living in fear as you read this.
This last week, if I’m being honest, has felt so heavy. I know I have to pay attention, even though it would be so much easier to not. Real human beings are affected by the executive orders and messages of hatred and shame that are filling homes and hearts while my white skin and 3rd generation American gets to choose to watch. It feels so heavy that I mostly don’t even know what to do. But in that moment, I knew that one little thing - telling my friends that I love them and that if someone they know needs help, I would do whatever I could if they reached out for help.
Do the little things right.3 This mantra is one from my sports world. In the overwhelm of the game, thinking about changing the outcome can feel daunting, but doing the little things right will add up. Executing a skill accurately in a small moment will often lead to a larger desired outcome. This is my mantra for 2025. In marriage, in parenting, in coaching, and in friendship - do small things with right intention- execute with precision the small moments of life. And so this week, as I felt so small in the face of big discrimination, I executed: “I do not agree with what is happening. And I will do what I can in both word and action to let you know that like Jesus, I am for the stranger, the foreigner, the immigrant, the refugee- all who feel marginalized by society.”
Delight
47 seconds on the clock. The game tied: 6-6. Her teammate passed the ball in. One pass, then two, and then into her outstretched arms. She pulled the ball into position and took the shot. Follow through pointing at the rim. The ball - hit the black outline on the backboard and swished.
Up by two. Her feet left the floor, the joy flooding her face for just a moment. Then back she flew on defense. We jumped up in the stands, arms extended with exuberant victory cheer. Double high fives and hugs. Parents and friends soaking in this magical moment for their 7th-grade girls. The clock countdown continued: 3-2-1-0. Celebration ensued! This kid of mine. Watching her hit the game-winning shot: pure delight. What a moment for her. What a moment for us all.4
Your Turn
I’d love to hear your small moments with big impact! What delighted you this January? Don’t hesitate to share in the comments or hit reply and tell me in an email!
Vignettes are short, evocative descriptions or accounts of events. My intention with my writing for Anam Cara, which means spiritual friend, is about insight, not complete and formally edited work. Though there will be times you can tell more effort has been put into the editing, I hope you will embrace the posts like these that have been stirring in my mind and heart for weeks but are written in the small windows I have between driving children around town and teaching math to a 7th grader!
Say it like a party chant, not a judge holding a gavel.
“Right” is a loaded word. I choose it intentionally because 1) in sports it’s about executing the skill correctly 2) right is tied to the word righteous which I’ve learned is about “right relationship” - not necessarily being able to win an argument or to be found “correct” but in fact prioritizing people and relationships as the most important thing. Kindness, empathy, mercy, and love being the order of the day - right relationship.
Watching 7th-grade basketball has been a true delight this January. A beautiful reminder of how powerful sports can be, and the something very special about middle school sports that include anyone who wants to participate!